Tuesday, March 1, 2011

No Homo aka Pause

Just a story I think you guys will appreciate.

So we have a new guy that started with my union, and most of the people that work with me are chicks. Which has been a bad thing for the most part because I think we know that chicks like to bring out the high drama at noon. But anyway. I was glad it was a dude that started because we need more testosterone in that bitch to help cut the amount of estrogen in that office. When he first started a couple weeks ago, one of the chicks asked me, "Well? Is he cute?" I just stared at her for almost a full minute before responding, "Uh, I guess so, yeah." She walked off, apparently satisfied with my answer.

I sat there in my office for a few minutes thinking to myself, "Why the fuck did she ask me that? Why of all people would she be asking ME if I thought some dude was cute? What the fuck does she think I am?" Then I realized, oh, she thinks I'm a 100% hetero chick with an appreciation for dudes. I mean, since I AM married and all. After THAT I realized that my initial reaction was a total straight dude reaction in similar situations. All like, "Why are you asking me? How the fuck would I know??" The funny thing is, when she asked me the question, I was SO UNCOMFORTABLE while I was trying to figure out how to answer. After all this ran through my head I just sat there in my office and laughed my ass off. Which probably contributed to my coworkers thinking I'm a crazy bitch.

Later on that night, I went home and said to manz, "Gross, can you believe they asked me if the new dude was cute? What the fuck is that about?" He just looked at me for a minute and laughed. Then he says, "I love you."

If anyone's interested, I guess after thinking about it, in conventional terms the dude is a decent looking guy. He's not ugly, I don't think. (Not exactly a ringing endorsement, is it? But what else do you expect from me?)


  1. LOL.
    You know why i can relate to this?
    My girl used to work at Olive Garden. And one day two of her friends came in to eat, and one of the was trying to check out some dude who worked there. So she asked if he was cute and my girl says, "I don't know. I guess. He's just some guy. The girl at the bar is cute though."

    Hey, i got something you need to see:


  2. I just told manz this story. At the end I said, "Yeah, you and him? LUCKY." Then I paused for a moment and said, "Just kidding." He says, "...But not really."

    Nah, not really.

  3. I can picture you laughing at your computer screen now. lol.