So because today sucks -
In case you're wondering, that would be because:
1. My bathroom ceiling is about to collapse onto my toilet and into my shower
2. I just took out a pair of pants from the clean laundry basket this morning for work and of course already have a stain on them
3. Fucking people won't do their god damned jobs right
4. Fucking people won't leave me alone
I got blessed with internet lulz from my peeps.
Another "Best of" from Craigslist.
The title is: Want it from behind while you play Super Mario Brothers?
And it just gets better. It starts with:
Do you love to play Super Mario Brothers on the Classic Nintendo System? Do you like to get tagged from behind while you do it? This is the post for you then.
My favorite part?
When you reach the end of level one, make sure to trigger the fireworks. This is vital to the entire experience. I must hear the fireworks. When level 2 begins and Mario walks into the pipe, I will penetrate you. You may say things like, "MORE", "HARDER", "YES", "FUCK ME", but nothing else. I will continue having sex until the level ends. DO NOT take the secret level skip. If you die I will pull out and spank you until the level restarts.
And of course, since I'm all about the violence and aggression, this article on Cracked made me laugh.
An instructional article that goes in depth on how to win a fight that's you vs. 20 kids is epic win. ESPECIALLY when you have awesome illustrations like this:
If there is a hell, I'm so there. I'll drive the party bus down.